3 Jan 2010...a visit with frens....@Taman Tamadun Islam

A new feel....

Salam....
2nd day in new year..2010...a new feel..n a new way...a new improvement...with new wishes to be fulfill..working harder and harder...to achieve the target...hoping that everything is done is on the right track...n blessed!!!
Meeting in the morning was started at 9.00..but I was the only one missed the train...n I was at teh place at 8.30.,....it is ok to come earlier, rite???????heheheheh
So today is only to settle all the forms...marks...n tomorrow is the last meeting for our team...hoping that I'm able to accomplish everything tonight...there are a lot of things....which are not yet settled...
I need to get back to mt school tomorrow morning to get my boss's endorsement.. .what a forgetful mind...I forgot to get it before this....again I have to rush to the meeting at 9.30...thanks to my team leader n also was my guider when I was doing my practical training at SMK Dato' Razali Ismail formerly known as SMK Bandar..My team leader is very dedicated..thank you so much for the help.....
Today was also a very tiring day....I went to Mydin n Giant hypermarket..but unsuccessful to get any parking lot...an the traffic was also terrible!!! two days I went at the same place..but also did not get any place...I do not understand...why the peole is busy shopping here n there...hehehheheh...at last I went to Mydin branch in Kuala Ibai....huhuhu...there was still many ppls...but luckily I got the parking!!!!!! I just wanted to buy my fahter's thing..he asked me to get something...n thanks God..I got it....
Along the way from Jalan Sultan Mahmud heading to Batu 6 tru Manir, I was very shocked n frightened to see how the Malay younger biking...very scary!!! Too dangerous n pitiful...demoralize!
They riding without concern the safety of themselves and also the other road users! Very rude...
This situatios showed that how the youngers act these days...they rather 'rempit n lepak' than doing something good..they choose to mingle with unhealthy activities...drugs..pills n other things which may harm themelves.
Poor Malay teenagers!! Im not bias of racist...but I just wanna see more Malay who involve in industry...success in bussines...be a successful person...why they do not 'race' for the success...in their life....they race for the horror death on the road...the look for the things to harm themselves....so pathetic!!

Epilog berakhir....revolusi baru bermula...

Wah....dah masuk 2010 kan???????????
Mcm xpercaya...tapi itulah...hakikat...malam tadi jugak berlakunya gerhana bulan...sekitar jam 2-5 pagi....mudah-mudahan segalanya diberkati n dirahmatiNya....InsyaAllah...
Hrm...oagi tahun baru seindah pagu Jumaat..hujan di luar mencurah-curah....hujan rahmat....
saya bergegas sewala jam 8.00 pagi ke lokasi 'meeting' hari ini...hurm meeting ni xde triplle cliam for overtime pon....insyaAllah..ganjaran tersirat....who knows??????????
Apa2 pun agak kelam labut..pagi ni..sebab ada bahan yang xsempat saya bereskan....malu n segan dengan orang2 lama....itulah malam tadi excited nak tgok celebration new year di Trg...huhhuh padahal xada apa lah sangat..hanyalah bersesak...traffic jam dr bulatan penyu..sehingga ke Syahbandar...huhhuuh...huhuhuhu...itulah 1st n last saya nk tgok celebration...tp xde nampak apa2 pon..tidak sehebat bandaraya2 lain yg gah di luar sana...apa2 pun yang penting azam kita untuk menjadi lebih baik dari semalam adalah lebih penting dari semua jenis cara sambutan tu....hehehehe..InsyaAllah.....saya akan buat yg terbaik untuk capai segala yang baik..dalam hidup ini...perlu revolusi untuk maju ke hadapan..ibarat seperti slogan yang masih saya ingat sewaktu pernah bekerja di sektor swasta dulu..'one revolution ahead'.....sampai ke hari ini saya ingat slogan tu walaupon dah lama saya tinggalkan bidang tu....tempat pertama saya mencari rezeki...manakan saya nak lupa.....
So...untuk hari2 seterusnya di tahun 2010..saya mengharapkan semua yang baik-baik untuk semua orang termasuk utk diri saya...tinggalkan segala epilog2 duka....biarlah ia berlalu meninggalkan kita....apa yang baik....atau buruk itulah guru kita untuk akan datang...
Untuk kawan2 yang mengunjung blog saya...SELAMAT TAHUN BARU YE.......untuk 2010...saya akan berusaha lebih gigih....GAMBATE!!!!

Say Good bye to 2009...welcome 2010...

Time for counting!!! It is nearly to reach 2010...another few hours to go...slowly left 2009...waving for 2010...
Wish to all my dear friends..happy new year....may everything will be better than last years...may every wish...every dream...will be achieved in 2010..
Together..work out for the best!!!InsyaAllah...semoga rezeki di tahun 2010 lebih baik dari hari-hari yang sebelum ini....SELAAMT TAHUN BARU 2010..UNTUK SEMUA RAKYAT MALAYSIA..!!!

Balgis's day out part 2

Balqis@Nyonya Penang Restaurant...


Waaaaaaaahhh....banyaknye menu...apa kite nak makan ni...nyum..nyum...Diorang ni nak suruh kite pilih ke....macam le kita pandai bace eik.....

Umi saye!!!

Ayah n Umi saye...

Jap la....belum pilih lagi menu ni...

Macam best je....

Hai...

Last2..ayah jugak yang plih menu...ngeeeeeeee

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

Even with our fists held high
It never would've worked out right
We were never meant for do or die

I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hold you, now I can't stop

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you want to cry

Started with a perfect kiss then we could feel the poison set in
Perfect couldn't keep this love alive
You know that I love you so, I love you enough to let you go

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

Already gone, already gone, already gone
Already gone, already gone, already gone, yeah

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

I want you to know that it doesn't matter
Where we take this road someone's gotta go
And I want you to know you couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on so I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right when you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on so I'm already gone

~~~!!!~~~

Salam...entry kali..ni xtau nak letak tajuk apa.....so itulah jadinya bila xtau nak letakkan tajuk apa...
X berapa hari lagi....kembali menatap wajah2 pelajar kesayangan....huhuhuhuh...hari ni meeting...xsudah2 dengan KPI...hadush!!! Nak kena buat KPI utk subject masing2 plak...erm....alhamdulillah hasil kerja saya dijadikan contoh lagi hari ni...hihhihhi....
So esok n lusa dah xde meeting...1-3 plak....marking paper xsudah2 lagi..asyik malas....sempat....yakin boleh...hehehehe...anak2 buah yg sarawak dah balik...malam tadi sampai...riuh-rendah si Faiz..tu...xhabis2 angannya...Faiz dah besar...hehehehe...xapalah Iz...nnt dah nak sekolah....eok je dia tadi..'ayah...faiz nak gi umah nenek..'
macam umah nenek dia leh gi jalan kaki...hihihihihi..
Rasanya nak lakukan perubahan yang banyak utk 2010...nak kerja lebih gigih lagi.....n yg penting nak cari ruang n peluang utk sambung belajar...dah lama asyik delay je......2010 ni harap2 menjadi lah......lama2 tangguh nanti..susah...mudah-mudahan semua laluan ok je nanti....amin!

Serabut!!!

Isj...serabut btul.....dgn cikgu sorang tu...semua kije...mesti nak kait ngan kita...sampaikan nak pilih pattern langsir bilik dia.....pun kita gak.....xsudah2....dah la kije dia hari kita siapkan..dia elok2 je balik kg.....isk!!!
Ni dah sampai tahap serabut ni....minta maaf le..pasni malas dah nak lebih2 kan tgn ni...hukur sana sini...nnt apa2 hal orang buat keja half way..then kita gak last2 kena sambung.....
Erm...skarang..dah malas nak layan..nak settle kerja sendiri ni je..hari ni dia ajak kita pegi umah tukang jahit langsir tu....erm..kita senyap n wat kije kita je...kalo dia faham..faham lah....kita dah mula SERABUT ni....jgn sampai over limit dah le....kat mana2 pon rasa serabut aje...haishy!!!
Rilek2....tarik nafas.....then baru buat kije......huhuhuhh

Awaken!!!

Wah....baru kembali ke dunia yang nyata!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today...

Early bird = attended meeting....bukan meeting tapi ala2 taklimat ang membosankan....
Afternoon = Rushed to Peladang Setiu Agro Resort....ambil cek...then ke CIMB...cek palang..so have to wait for another 2 days lah....then bayar instalment kuda hitamku....then balik rumah....
Mengantuk bangat...semalam tido lewat giler!!!!! Time taklimat sempat marking 2-3 scripts...heheheh..
So petang ni apa citer??????????
Xde plan..nk tidow.....je kot!!!!Yeahaaaaaaaaaaa!

Already gone..

Lirik Lagu Ressa Herlambang - Menyesal

Semula Ku Tak Yakin
Kau Lakukan Ini Padaku
Meski Dihati Merasa
Kau Berubah Saat Kau Mengenal Dia

Reff:*

Bila Cinta Tak Lagi Untukku
Bila Hati Tak Lagi Padaku
Mengapa Harus Dia Yang Merebut Dirimu

**

Bila Aku Tak Baik Untukmu
Dan Bila Dia Bahagia Dirimu
Aku Kan Pergi Meski Hati Tak Akan Rela

Terkadang Ku Menyesal
Mengapa Ku Kenalkan Dia Padamu

Back To Reff:* Dan **

Back To Reff:* Dan **

Terkadang Ku Menyesal
Mengapa Ku Kenalkan Dia Padamu

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Balqis's day out part 1

Dua dunia.....

!
thinking.....

Nak tu!!!!!!!!!!!

Balqis nak snap p ic ayah la....

Ayah ..nak makan apa ni...

pretty girl...

Jom gi jalan2....

End of 2009..

2009....approaching to the end...to leave everything..Suka duka silih berganti..sepanjang 2009...
Pelbagai kisah pahit manis akan kutinggalkan...menuju ke dunia baru...melangkah tapak demi tapak...mengatur langkah demi langkah ke arah yang terbaik...
Buat semua teman...terima kasih atas segalanya....sumbangan tenaga....idea dan segala...terima kasih juga atas segala kenangan indah..pahit manis...semoga semua itu adalah guru yang terbaik untuk langkah seterusnya...

Life is sometime suck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alhamdulillah...

My Dad is home!!!!!!!
Wah rindunya kat my dad....after a month time he left me to Mecca...alhamdulillah he is very2 fine......

Approaching the end..

Another 7-8 days to leave 2009....the ending of all the stories...series of life will be coming up next...
It is not the story or anything else to be counted on...it is about our next wish...next mission...which is may turn ant dark spot to become white...to polish up any faded items become shiny...
The Hijrah year is already tom increase its number..turn to be.1430...it is already in new year mood...but not all of us noticed about this changes..may be..the busy life made us almost forget it..sometime we noticed it..we noted about the change..but delayed to take action...n in the end...pending for further action...n buried there...without any refreshing...
Just hoping that the next..2010...will be more meaningful..full of delightful...excitement...n better than before..the next days...bloom out colorfully...story all the sweet scents will...mesmerize the next days...the next breath lead to the best way....of life....InsyaAllah...
May the ending..is part of the happy beginning for 2010...

I Hate when...

People keep on blaming me....
People who like to bother about me...
People who like to show off their 'concern' to me...
People who never understand me..
People who never know the true story...n then blaming my fault...
Realy HATE Those people who r very bzbody..to mingle with other people life...
Please...understand the others' feeling....please respect...friends' feeling.......please......
a word would hurt people for thousand years....

What is next...

Life is great...life is complicated...life is a commitment...life is a duty....life is everything....
Life....life...what ever happens...life goes on....life must go on....
But we never can expect what is next....that will happen...even the plan is done...but still could not predict...what is next...because everything is not in our hand...just pray for the best thing for the next life......amin!!
Forget the past...live for the next...must be stronger than yesterdayssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!!!!

Say it isn't so....

Skies are dark
It's time for rain
Final call
You board the train
Heading for tomorrow

I wave goodbye to yesterdays
Wipe the tears, you hide your face
Blinded by the sorrow

How can I be smiling like before
When baby you don't love me anymore?

Say it isn't so
Tell me you're not leaving
Say you've changed your mind now,
That I am only dreaming,
That this is not goodbye,
This is starting over
Mmmmm....
If you wanna know
I don't wanna let go,
So say it isn't so

Ten to five at least we've tried
We're still alive but hope just died
As they close the door behind you
Whistle blows and tons of steel
Shake the ground beneath the wheels
As I wish I'd never found you, whoa...

How can I be smiling when you're gone
Will I be strong enough to carry on?

Say it isn't so
Tell me you're not leaving
Say you've changed your mind now,
That I am only dreaming,
That this is not goodbye,
This is starting over
Say I'm not wide awake
If you wanna know
I don't wanna let go,
So say it isn't so

Miles and miles to go,
Before I can say, before I can lay
My love for you to sleep
Oh darling oh
I've got miles and miles to go,
Before anyone will ever hear
Me laugh again.

Say it isn't so
Tell me you're not leaving
Say you've changed your mind now,
That I am only dreaming,
That this is not goodbye,
This is starting over
Say I'm not wide awake
If you wanna know
I don't wanna let go
So say it isn't so

Say you've changed your mind now,
That I am only dreaming,
That this is not goodbye,
This is starting over
Say I'm not wide awake
If you wanna know
I don't wanna let go
So say isn't so

If you wanna know
I don't wanna let go
So say it isn't so

Everything is not as easy as A, B, C....

Yes...I found it true!!!! Some people I met..never ever been grateful with the things come to them...For them...everything is easy to get...n east to lose...never appreciate people around them..never been thankful to the kindness of other people to them...never appreciate he others' feeling...why these type of people are been gbiven chances to live......???????????
Why they must ignore the beauty of friendship....why they never respect their friends' feeling..why they tend to hurt their friend...why they they must back stabbing their own friend just to satisfy themselves?????????????????
And why I must mingle with these type of people....something jerking me...but....these are always seeking for me..n my emphatic slowly goes to them....y....????
Y me....????? I want to ignore them!!!!!!!!!!!
IGNORE FOR THE ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!!!
If you think that is easy for you to break...to hurt others' heart...then go on...breaking...n hurting...but once you feel the same thing....then you will know how it is going to kill your feeling....
You will know how hard to mend it...to cure it n to recover from it..God is always be with good people..God knows the best to His caliph...God knows when is the right time for you to feel it that way....you will suffer it thousand times compared to what you have done to the others.....I believe in karma...May Allah gives you the guide to the truth....shines your heart to the right way....leads you to the correct path....pull you out of the darkness...go n seek for His forgiveness...so that you will life peacefully....If you think that is easy for you to do anything without any limit.....you are wrong.....someday..there will come time for you to feel the same way like what you had done to you friends.......Life is no like playing poker..the winner will get money for the triumph...but not all the time....sometime we get down....collapse....n to get up...need hands to help....who????????????????? One day..you will understand it more....deepest meaning...Life is just like a roller coaster...ups n downs...need to be stronger...n brave heart....

Marking paper...

Meeting started at 8.30....got almost 300 scripts to marked within 11 days....hoping that I am able to complete it all...before the due date....wish everything is good..moga2 Allah permudahkan segala urusanku..amin!

Am back!!!!

Huh!!!! after 6.5 hours driving...am now in KT....leaving the hectic city....leaving the bitterness back...leaving every drop of tear...along the highway...became the rain drops...wish everything clean n clear now....reaching 2010...hoping everything will be better...don't want to mingle with anything that would harm ....hurt me...KL for almost 4 days...sometime happy...enjoy...but sorrowfully was also there..but now am wake up!!! Something awaken me!!!!! Life goes on....with stronger heart....cold heart???????????????hhehehehehe...may b....wish that 2009 will be ended with a lot of sweet memories to bring forward....n a lot of lessons to be my teacher for the next time....good bye to all....2009...leave me peacefully...please....

Hati menangis...xsiapa peduli...

Menangis selagi mampu...
Mengeluh selagi berdaya...
Bertahan selagi kekuatan ada...
Hati sayu..pilu....sedih..remuk....resah...segalanya di situ...
Mengharapkan agar 2010 akan datang..segalanya bermula dengan lebih baik dari 2009...
Mengharapkan agar..2010 tiada lagi kisah sedih yang berulang...
Ingin kutinggalkan segalanya jauh di belakang...agar ia tidak mengekori ke mana saja langkah ku..
Ya Allah...kuatkan semangatku....bantulah aku dalam menangani segalanya....amin!

Next trip...

Salam...the whole day...was out at school..town n etc...got so many things to do..and also unexpected work suddenly given to me...haiyya boss..next time don;t do like this maaa.....u made me so fatigue...damn tired thingking of the solution...which is never ever settled if the person in charge would not lend his hand to help....huhuhuhuhu...
So tomorrow....sett off to Kuantan around 9 am as planned...so still not yet packing my stuff to bring there...next day oso have to drop by at school to collect some more other things to bring...this afternoon was rushing to settle some work n to go town ......penat!!
Bos plak suddenly order kek 2 biji!!! isk,,,boss ni dah tau jadual aku tadi....semapt2 je dia main order..sorry puan..sempat buat sebijik je..ye......huhuhuhuh..mane nak dan 2 bj sampai umah pon dah kul 9....esok nak drive kg kuantan..xkan nak tido kul 4 pagi....barang2 pon xpack lagi....hadui!!!!!

BBQ with my students..

Hai..salam...
lama x up date blog....bz skit...macam2 hal...semalam last paper untuk budak2 aliran sains skolahku...so hari ni kitaorang ber'bbq'..for the last day...semalam agak pack masa...malam tadi..bz prepared utk menu hari ni...ayam panggang...puding n macam2....penat betul hari ini..tapi enjoy....budak2 pon happy je....hehehehe...start kul 10 pagi...lewat nak tunggu bara api untuk panggang ayam2 tu semua....erm..boss pon join kami hari ini...heheheheheheh....boss kami kalo bab makan..sempoi...tu yang best sebab selalu je ade high-table asrama....idea boss lah tu..so kami semua leh tumpang makan....hehehehehehe...xsempat posing bnyk2....beberapa keping je snapped tadi......inilah dia....

Relief..

Alhamdulillah...the paper wasn't so difficult..pray for my students to get flying color!!!!!!

Good Luck...Tomorrow..

To all my beloved students....all the best for ur chemistry paper tomorrow...semoga kejayaan mengiringi usaha kalian selama ini......

had fun..enjoy myself!

Today...I really enjoyed myself...with them...
I will be missing them next time...

Mending time...

Hi.. n salam...
What a good sunny day..today...I colud see the sun shines..through out the day...dawn to dusk..
And I'm easily driving to my work...seeing their faces...gave me a satisfaction..I will be missing them...next time...
It has been a long time I did not write...did not make any up date on this site...Yea..am a bit busy...doing this n that...I like to cherish up my day n night with work...so that I do not even have much more time to think about anything else...even at night I could not have enough sleep.....hehehehehe...
Lately..a lot of unnecessary things came across..my day..n yet..i don't have any way of solution..to mend it all...I even do not have much time...to settle down everything..Y???? I don't have any appropriate reason...just let it be...just let it there...some good day..I will mend it all..I will find another new way of settling it all..perhaps so...

hurmm....

hurm...huh....arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....hurm...erm...??????????

Sakit pinggang...

Argh..backache is coming again...................

silence...

keep silent....
silence brings thousand meanings....
the best way is..stay calm...patient...n silent...
silence kills every loud of noise..
silence shuts every opening mouth...
silence gives the satisfaction..

Activity...

today...early morning got extra chemistry class with form four students...A bit late reached at school...waited for my students..tot they were not coming..but they sat at another class...so started the class around 9.30 a.m...
Got an early bird call..my daddy called from Mecca...informed that he alreadt came back from Mina..alhamdulillah..
So..the topic salt could not be completed...the students were so eager to go home at 12...it was raining in the morning..till now...so will be continued next year.....if am alive...
Rushed to CIMB to make a payment....since I noticed that tomorrow is 3rd of Dec...so need to clear up the payment b4 4th....
It is still raining outside...probably the next day...flood again....n will stuck at home again!
Am still thinking n thinking..what is the best thing to do....huh????????????????

Susah sgt ke nak bagi peluang....

Kenapa susah nak bagi peluang?????????Kenapa susah nak trust orang lain....?
Dan kenapa mesti jadi macam tu?????????????
Kenapa pilih untuk jadi macam tu...?Teruk sangat ke orang lain tu....kenapa susah nak bercakap benar..kenapa mesti tipu sana tipu sini..apa yg korang dapat ye??/
Bagilah peluang kat diri sendiri untuk jadi seorang yg dipercayai....sudah2 lah jadi penipu....cubalah jadi orang yg jujur....cukupla tipu kawan-kawan semata-mata kepentingan diri....x kan ke mana semua tu....

One day..

I met him after a year leaving...
the last word given to him....Stop seeking for me....and I left him...He looked unsatisfying...n said...why simply said these words......
I noted that u r feeling less...n u will never consider my last words...n I know that he never meant to what he had said or what he had done..His words were always...nothing....Just words..with no intention.....

life is easy come n easy go

Life is not like a bed of roses...looking good n beautiful outside...but full with thorns...if not carefully to touch...we might be hurt ourselves..same goes to life...full of ups n downs...sometime uncertain things happened beyond our expectation...unpredictable!
But if we are really smart n know how to handle this life...everything seems to be very easy...but its just words...which portrayed something easy but the fact is opposed it..true!
So many times I'd been in the same situation...and so many times I failed to be strict to myself...used to bend my promises...just because my empathy to others! but who cares about me? Definitely nobody...helping the others without expecting the refund!!!Yes....I never expect someone will give back their help to return my kindness but I believe in karma...someday...there will be a good Samaritan who comes to our life..who will save us...help us...and than disappeared after the help....I wish to be like that....but when??????????????? It is just like a daydream...isn't it?
I don't know how to be a reluctant person to those who are always giving me a trouble....It seems very hard to speak up with the word 'NO'....am not saying that I'm damn good in helping other people...but the situation always goes like this..happens to me very often...Once am trying to forget...to chase away every bad stories....it will appear again in another episode of my life....how hard I tried to avoid it....than it will easily come....n again am defeated by my self....my strength gone by the wind....
It is hard to treat people fairly...it is difficult to be fair..to all people...and the hardest part......is to give humans satisfaction....I put my effort working on it....but it resulted...me...disappointment!
Frustrated....it is hard to find a trust in other people...out of the blue moon to find honesty....
Sometime talking to myself....(sort of mumbling to myself) why me????????? Why they all people are always take for granted,,,,selfish???????????? Is it very difficult to honest...to your friend....to treat your friend just like a friend.....not like a slave....or like a welfare centre...or welfare officer....?
What is the meaning of F.R.I.E.N.D to you.....??????????????????????
I know..it depends on what you're thinking...some people say friend is like a normal person..who can give help during the hardship...or what so ever...it can be anything...according to what people describe it...right?
I'm very tired to face..to be in this situation...am going to stop everything so that I can enjoy my life happily...without these types of people who r always burden me!!!!! ( I'm gonna loose my rewards from Him since I'm blabbering for every good thing I'd done....?????????? OMG......)
whatever...this entry is just my writing to relief the painful inside...it is not an ordinary pain...it just more than the pain...which is cannot express by words..or even by action...but enough to tell that every time this situation happens...it hurts me very much............I keep hoping that those person really understand this.....n respond in a good way to me....(but it is just a dream or nightmare!..hahaha)
The thing like that will never happen!!!! As long as they are like that...so they are always like that...nobody is gonna change them..until they realise to be better than yesterday...to do the best in their life.......may the merciful will be credited to them...as the pay of good deed in their life...hope so....May God opens their eyes widely to see the more n most beautiful things in this world...may God awakes them to feel the reality...that they are not living in their own life...they are not building their own civilization or kingdom......wake up friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Buntu..dalam mencari sesuatu!!!

Hah!!! Kembali buntu....! Kenapa ye??
Hurm..mungkin sudah semakin lama...semakin lalai..makanya...jika agak ralit n leka..dgn dunia...ukhrawi sekadar yang wajib...macam ni lah jadinya..astaghfirullah....lalai lagi!!!!
Alhamdulillah...tersedar sekarang....belum ke penghujungnya....kembali ke asal...back to the root....syukur kerana diberi ilham lebih awal untuk menyedari betapa lalainya dengan duniawi semata....
Kadang-kadang ujian untuk hambaNya pelbagai....bentuk...jika buntu..maka adalah silap di mana2 yang tak kita sedari....maka perlu sentiasa istiqamah!!!!
Aduh....aku hamba yang amat lemah...semoga sentiasa disinari cahaya keimanan....dilimpahi segala rahmatNya..agar tidak lagi terlalu leka...denga tugas2 harian....amin!

!!!!!

LoVe ThosE Who Love YOu!!!!!

Distracted????

Why????
the simple answer is....wanna kill everything that brings harmful to life...How? Still seeking for the best way....everything seems to be very simple n easy at first thought...but the implementation...is not as east as ABC.....:(..
Kenapa ye...susah sangat nak faham situasi sekarang...buat baik salah...buat jahat lagi lah salah..buat tak tau?Nanti orang kata kera sumbang...so segalanya serba x kena..susah untuk satisfy other people...esepcially someone yg sukar untuk difahami...Tolong susah..xtolong...lagi lah serba salah..pendek kata hidup sentiasa in doubt...Aku cuba buat setakat yang termampu...walaupun kadang2 agak terganggu dengan semua ni...tapi aku cuba untuk tidak mengungkit! Bahaya kalo ungkit segala pertolongan kita....apa yang patut dilakukan...fikirkan segala yang buruk pernah kita buat kat orang..itu yang terbaik..kawan aku pernah bagi quote ni..ala2 mcm gitu lah maksudnya...so everytime aku down...atau situasi yang jadikan aku mcm ni..aku mula akan fikir...apa kesilapan aku buat hari ni....heheheh..xapalah apa saja alasannya..yang penting..niat kta...
Isk..malam ni buntu untuk teruskan....mungkin idea masih belum cair...beku...penangan cuaca...sejuk....ye ke?ye kot....hehehehheeh..so better stop drpd terus merapu....!

Day 4??

The 4th day went successfully...morning till afternoon bz at school...with these n those things....tomorrow...still have to be at school...another report n claim need to be done...n another call for meeting with my PK 1....am oso bz finishing the orders....layer cake for Raya Haji...so everything went well...Banjir was also not at a dangerous level...back to normal..no more closed roads...so these pics were snapped this evening....rumah saya xbanjir..ni sekitar kawasan kampung2 on the way ke sekolah saya...

Thanks...for the triumph of making me....sick!!!!

The thing is just a trifling...nothing much to worry.....but for some people..it is just a big winning!...n I am defeated.....huh!!!!No cry n no worry...I believe that the mercy will b there for the people like me....amin!

Day 3

Wah...dah masuk day hari ke3 cuti....hurm xcam cuti pon...pepagi dah menapak ke skolah...siapkan kije2 filing...beres@Esok skit lagi nk kena sambung..Esok discussion ngan PK 1 cancelled!hehehehehe....esok kena p jugak...kja skit lagi tinggal....laporan tinggal 2 lagi xbuat...minit mesyuarat....laporan taklimat...bla..bla....hihihihi..
Kelas???????????hohoho..masih ada kelas tambahan dengan form 4....entah berapa kerat yang mai nanti....hukhuhkhukh...ujan2 ni...cuti plak tu....diorg sakan le cuti..
Petang tadi...menjamu selera bersama Puan Fazila n suami....Thanks a lot......1st time dapat makan steambot yang ok kat Kuala Terengganu...punyalah payah nak cari steamboat area Trg ni...selalu menapak sampai ke KL...apa lagi kalo si Johny steamboat..huhuhhuhu..xpala...at least dapat la puaskan ati...erm kalo sapa2 terasa nak makan steamboat yang ok ni...bleh la p ke Paradise Deluxe..Jalan Pasir Panjang...weakness...?Lembab skit service..nak kena tanya satu2..baru depa mai...isk!!!kena sabaq skit la...Malam baru sampai umah...lepak sat....pasni ada keja lagi...yeahaaaaaaaa!!!Hurm..bukak FB..baca komen...senak je otak...baca komen...malas nak layan...delete je...pada aku...stupid people will say something stupid....hehehe so xyah layan lah...
Tido lagi best........tadaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Kenapa prejudis...

Setiap anak Adam yang dilahirkan...diibaratkan seperti kain putih yang bersih..halus mulus..suci....semakin membesar...kain itu akan berubah..bertukar mungkin menjadi corak yang yg menarik..indah..atau sebaliknya...namun begitu..tiada siapa yang tahu dari awal..bgaimana bentuk corak itu akan terjadi nnt..kerana semua itu terletak padaNya...
Hari ini..sudah mengjangkau 4 tahun berada di bidang pendidikan...dan sangatlah cetek pengalaman yang ada...tetapi...setiap apa yang berlaku seharian..itulah pengalaman yang akan menjadi guru terbaik...tidak semua orang lahir dalam kesempurnaan..dan setiap yang lahir dalam kesempurnaan..masih jga akan ada kekurangan serba sedikit...sebagai manusia..tidak salah rasanya mencari kesempurnaan....atau berusaha ke arah sempurna...mencari yang terbaik...tetapi yang tidak adil rasanya adalah...mencari kesempurnaan dalam diri orang lain..sedangkan diri sendiri masih lagi jauh untuk mencapai tahap sempurna...salah rasanya kalau kita memandang serong atau..menghina seseorang..tanpa kita ketahui cerita sebenar...kenapa perlu prejudis...?..Setiap manusia yang menderita itu ada kalanya tidak perlukan simpati dari semua orang...sekiranya tidak mampu membantu...cukuplah sekadar memberi sokongan moral...bukannya menghina dalam keadaan tersirat....adakala..tutur

kata yang terluah sedikit sebanyak menggambarkan apa yang tersirat di hati....dan adakalanya manusia terlalu 'excited' n bangga..ego dengan apa yang ada dalam diri mereka...dan apabila dijadikan bahan rujukan....ego akan menutup segala kebaikan...yang ada...sikap bangga diri...akan menguasai diri dan kita akan memandang segala yang ada di sekeliling ...dengan pandangan yang tidak seberapa..seolah-olah segalanya amat kerdil untuk diri kita..kenapa ye??Kenapa terlalu mencari kesempurnaan...kenapa sanggup kita kecewakan manusia2 sekeliling kita....kenapa susah untuk menghargai apa yang ada di sekeliling kita ni? Perlu berbayar kah nilai kemanusiaan itu?
Tiada seorang pon di dunia ini yang inginkan sesuatu yang buruk berlaku dalam hidupnya..mahu pun merancang sesuatu yang buruk....setiap orang mahukan yang terbaik..tetapi adakalanya halangan mendatang terlalu banyak..atau mungkin kerana kesilapan kecil...maka pelbagai yang buruk berlaku tanpa diduga...cubalah menjadi rasional..profesional dalam menangani masalah yang ada..bukan dengan menjadikan kelemahan orang sebagai satu syarat..untuk berdampingangan dengan kita...tidak perlu menjulang keegoan itu...tidak perlu berlagak diri itu amat sempurna..baik dalam segala hal..tidak perlu menghina orang-orang sekeliling kita...kayu pengukur kebaikan manusia bukan dengan kesempurnaan dalam segala hal...malah dalam dunia ini..tiada manusia yang SEMPURNA!!!!
Sesunnguhnya aku penat berada dalam situasi sebegini...dan sebolehnya ingin ku lari...sembunyi...tapi di mana...?Larilah selagi termampu....selagi itulah segalanya akan sentiasa segar dalam ingatan...aku sentiasa ingin lakukan yang terbaik untuk semua....cuba sedaya upaya..tetapi seandainya...semua itu tiada penghargaan...walaupun dengan dua ungkapan..'terima kasih'..apa lagi harus kutunggu??????????
Sebaiknya..aku berterima kasih atas segalanya....ye..itulah yang sebaiknya....kerana sentiasalah mengingati kebaikan orang sekeliling terhadap kita...dan ingatlah apa saja keburukan yang kitalakukan kepada orang-orang sekeling kita..kerana dengan ini...kita akan sentiasa merasakan diri ini kerdil.....amat kerdil....

Day 2

Outside....it is raining heavily...continuously...non stop. Sometime drizzling..all activities stuck...at this moment due to the bad weather. .Tomorrow need to be at school...to settle a lot of things....waaaaaaa...byknye xbuat lagi...fail PEKA xserah lagi....file projek..x update lagi...minit mesyuarat????????Tinggal satu lagi yg last baru ni... tactical...plan operational plan...blaa..bla..bla...nak streaming n sorting students..analysing this n that...wah!!!!Rupanya banyak kije lagi...dah mentioned boss hari tu...serah tugas this Monday...she smiled.....heheheheeheh. Thanks madame. Erm..kek?Tempahan utk raya haji xsebanyak raya pose...so sempat lah....time cuti ni masa panjang skit....so stop dulu...hujan mencurah2.....best tidow!!!

Day 1

Today is the 1st day of school break...early morning..I still doing work related to school management.....seeking n surveying places for next month meeting...It was good when at last I found a suitable place...n booked it for 3D2N...
the 1st day is just the same with my other weekdays....nothing much different...tomorrow..anpther work awaiting....

Cuti ke??????????

Hihihihihih....di saat orang lain sibuk2 kejar sana sini untuk settle segala tugas before cuti panjang....aku hanya termangu-mangu....xtau nk mula yg mana..n sampai sekarang aku masih belom hand over semua tugas aku...muahahahaha dan aku masih dalam tugas....
Alhamdulillah..dah selesai tugas aku carikan tempat untuk meeting...dalam banyak2 tempat..akhirnya..Hotel Seri Malaysia Kuantan jugak lah yang available...during 11, 12 n 13 Dec...maklumlah booking last minute...pastu plak some resorts tu..nak deposit mcm2...ada yg nak 50% n ade gak yg nak lebih then kalo xjadi burn...mak aih!!!!Tapi xapalah...boss pon ok je bile tgok bajet kasar td...so kire ok lah...hurm...hari ni keputusan UPSR..alhamdulillah...daripada 4 orang anak2 buah aku..2 orang dapa 5A, sorang dapat 4A 1B n sorang lagi tu...oklah..lulus semua...so...yang dapat A..tu siap siaga la duit aku kali ni....huhuhu nak kena booking tiket ke langkawi lah tahun depan...huhhuhuh....lap top seketul!!!muahahahah utk yg 5 A aje....ngeh3...
Erm...petang ni balik awal..ntah apa nak godek kat umah awal2...kek lapis ade sebijik lagi untuk order sebelum Raya Haji...pastu Ahad ni mula nak buat utk yg Raya Haji...oklah...duit Raya..heheheh
Tadi call ayah...alhamdulillah sihat....semuanya...happy dengar suara dia dah ok..xserak mcm hari tu...Erm tunggu kawan nak datang..ade assignment nnt...heheheeh....so chao dulu...selamat bercuti kepada semua warga pendidik......!Sesi 2009 dah berakhir ..semoga berakhir dengan cemerlang...tahun depan dapat APC....heheheheheehehhe.....

Holiday is coming......

Another 1+++ day to complete 2009 session....holiday is just holiday...nothing much different to me...am still have to go to school..finish the incomplete tasks...banyak lagi nak kena up date...nak kena kemas kini...need to discuss with my PK 1...huhuhu..but it is okay for me..at least I have something to do rahter than doing nothing...thinking this n that which may bring headache!!!!
..Am working out of seeking some interesting places for our shcool management meeting....haiyaa!!!!
But still pending..n another matter arises...kalo banjir..kena prepare the alternative...if not..my boss will blow up...hhuuh takooooooooooooooooot!
Heheheeh..saya sentiasa menurut perintah!
Alhamdulillah..kesihatan ayah dah ok....saya je yang risau xmenentu..padahal dia berada di tempat jauh yang lebih baik...semoga segalanya baik untuknya...Hari ini dapat parcel kiriman dari ayah di Mekah..air zam2...2 kotak tu may be kurma..belum dibuka....
Penat jugak hari ini...walaupon xde kelas..SPM dah pon bermula...lupa nak wish to all SPM candidates....GOOD LUCK!
Balik dari skolah td..singgah pasar mini...beli barang2 utk buat soto...then malam ni..sempat sipakan sebiji je kek lapis asam mans....penat....plan nk buat 2...tapi rasa mcm dah k.o dah...so tido dulu..esok masih ada...menanti dengan pelbagai cerita n kisah...kisah semalam..biar je berlalu macam tu..xperlu dikenang...xperlu diingat.....apa2 pun...cuba elakkan ingat segala mcm hal yang menyakitkan jiwa..hahahahaha!
Good night..sweet dream!

Rindu..

Pagi2 tadi ayah call....sejak dah masuk Mekah..hari ni baru dapat panggilan dari dia...aku nak call..fikirkan dia mesti bz dgn umrah....before wukuf next week...Sedihnya biler dgr suara yg tersekat2...xsihat katanya...tapi dah ok skit..suara baru ada...baru dapat bercakap...Ya Allah..kurniakan ayahku kesihatan yang baik untuk dia dapat menjalani ibadat haji dengan sebaik2nya...aku xsampai hati untuk sembang lama...bila dengar suara dia sayup2...serak2 basah...
sememangnya....hati seorang anak akan risau fikirkan...ayah yang jauh di mata..doa aku semoga ayah bertambah sihat.....amin.

Jika memang diriku
Bukanlah menjadi
Pilihan hatimu
Mungkih sudah takdirnya
Kau dan aku
Takkan mesti bersatu

Haruslah slalu kau tahu
Ku mencintaimu di sepanjang waktuku
Harus slalu kau tahu
Semua abadi untuk selamanya

Karena ku yakin
Cinta dalam hatiku
Hanya milikmu
Sampai akhir hidupku

Karena ku yakin
Di setiap hembus nafasku
Hanya dirimu
Satu yang slalu ku rindu

Tapi bukan aku...yeah!!!

KerisPatih – Tapi Bukan Aku

jangan lagi kau sesali keputusanku
ku tak ingin kau semakin kan terluka
tak ingin ku paksakan cinta ini
meski tiada sanggup untuk kau terima

aku memang manusia paling berdosa
khianati rasa demi keinginan semua
lebih baik jangan mencintaiku aku dan semua hatiku
karena takkan pernah kau temui, cinta sejati

reff:
berakhirlah sudah semua kisah ini
dan jangan kau tangisi lagi
sekalipun aku takkan pernah mencoba kembali padamu
sejuta kata maaf terasa kan percuma
sebab rasa ku tlah mati untuk menyadarinya

semoga saja kan kau dapati
hati yg tulus mencintaimu
tapi bukan aku

The fact....

That's the fact!...Have to accept it..no matter how bitter it is...how hard to take it....that's it!!!!
I believe in karma...good deed rewarded good things....n so the opposite it...bad deed...paid with bad things....right?
Those who had suffered much...one sweet day...they will be rewarded with something better!
Those who had chosen to be at the wrong track...definitely suffer in the end....
Is there any new hope...for them?Perhaps so....
I have to close my eyes....take a deep breath....n think the best thing for my entire life....think the best way to forget everything...find another new way to improve myself...grab the chance appears...wise to use the time..n chance given...n the rest..leave it to Allah...y I used to b a very stubborn one...disobey to others' advises...if earlier I use my mind....listen to them...then I won't suffer....regret...till the end...
Anyway...thanks to those who r always supporting me...who are always be at my side when I really need a shoulder to cry on...when I really need pair or ears to listen to my stories..who are willing to wipe off my tears..God blesses all of u n pays the best thing in here and after... as for me...I'm not afford to pay all the kindness...I'm not a rich...the best is my prayers will always be recited purposely to those who has a very good heart...like u all of my frens!
Thank u so much...for helping me out of the darkness...giving n showing some ways...to find the rays...every good things will always be remembered...till the last breath!!!!
Choice we had taken...lead us either to the right or wrong path...just accpet it becos that was what we had chosen one,,,,may the happines be with us....n the always wining the good n succesfull life...Amin!

KEnapa ye...

Aduhai....kenapa la lately...ni rasa mcm ala2 sedih je...especially time alone....tiba2 rasa macam nak meluahkan sesuatu yg terpendam...tapi ...byk plak tapinya...tapi..tapi ini...n bla...bla..bla..
Nak diluahkan..bukan semua yang akan faham....yang pastinya seseorang itu sahaja yang biasa saya share segala macam cerita...
Sekarang mcm mana ye...perlu sangat untuk bercerita..kongsi segala mcm rasa nih...nak luah kat sini?Xpatut...xpatut....xboleh...xboleh....sarat sgt...malas nak menulis banyak2...lagi plak..nak karang ayat2 ni...idea dah xmacam masa form 5 dulu..laju je time wat essay....sekarang ..mcm merangkak2 je time writing...lack of vocabulary kot...bm n bi ...both...lemah skrg!
Xapalah....akan ada waktu untuk berbicara nanti...kan....:)..ok out dulu...utk ke majlis di sana.............bye.
Hurm....jawapan dah ada...just xnak admit je ttg tu...xpelah....kata orang tua...kalo sayangkan sesuatu...biarkan ia pergi....xsemestinya sesuatu yang kita betul2 sayang..akan serasi dengan kita...berkorban rasa awal2 ni..lebih baik dari kita memendam rasa...or derita kemudian hari...x apalah..anggap ke xde rezeki untuk kita...kan?
So...cubalah cari kebahagian tu kat tempat lain..xsemestinya bahagia tu letaknya hanya pada satu tempat je...bumi Allah ni luas...kan..usaha skit untuk bergerak menerokai alam indah ciptaan Tuhan.....:)
Cuba untuk mencari kebahagian yang mula menghilang..agar kembali ke sisi...xkira apa bentuknya nanti...terima seadanya..kerana itu adalah rezeki kita....InsyaAllah...cuba buat yang terbaik untuk diri sendiri.....

Chak!!!

Chak!!!
Am home!!!!!Awal skit lately balik umah...so dapat la online awal...kije makin byk hujung2 tahun ni..tapi otak mcm tepu nak fikir mana satu nak mula dulu..so layan game je dulu..tunggu cool dulu baru slowly nk tocuh mn2 yg patut..
Hurm..malam nanti Hi-Table feast kat asrama....makan lagi!Xpe..makan byk2.....selagi leh makan..makan je...hehehhhe....so up date nanti plak...

???

It's a story of my life...who is searching for the right...but it keeps avoiding me...huhuhuhu....was it? sometime feel like that way....something reluctant!
So sorrow...sorrowfully soul! Everything seems wrong neither to me nor to......
Just leave it to time...n fate...am not going to work on it...sitting on the fence...waiting n watching every flow...movement...slow or fast..sooner or later..there will be the best which is fated to all of us...perhaps..every single prayer will be blessed...

Kehadiranmu...mengubat resah....

Ia datang di saat-saat aku betul2 perlukan.....syukur alhamdulillah....sgt2 berterima kasih kepada semua yang terlibat atas usaha ini.....sangat hargai segalanya!!!Thanks!!!!!!!Aku happy untuk hari ini.......yeahaaaaaaaaaaa!

Today....

Hari ini...pepagi lagi keluar ke pasar minggu....sebab ada cikgu kat sekolah aku kirim belikan cadar n comforter...sampai sana xramai pon orang..agaknya sebab long waiting utk next pay....so agak ekonomi lah berbelanja sekarang..tu pasal pasar minggu tu xramai orang..kalo...x...nak jalan pun berasak2...huhhuuhhu..so dah beli 2 cadar tu..pusing2...beli ubi kayu..terasa nak makan ubi kayu rebus ngan air kopi..best2....tapi arini xujan....lagi plak tu sorang2..xbest gak nak makan..
Kebetulan tadi terserempak ngan kawan secondary...erm...she re-married...tapi agaknya malu nak menjemput...xapalah...asalkan dia happy..anak dia ngan arwah dah besar pon...last aku jumpa...masa dia delivered to her baby..pastu xde contact....tadi sempat tukar2 phone number...hurm..balik rumah around 12++++...sampai petang ni..macam bosan sebab tak tau nak wat apa...jap2 lagi nak wat kek...kain baru je sebahagian yang sempat lipat...nampak gayanyer...to be continued...muahahahaah...sejak ayah ke mekah....masak pon jarang..makan ala kadar..hehehehehe...esok sekolah!!!!Walawei....buku rekod dah 2 bulan xusik....terukkan?????????Apa2 ajelah....asalkan kerja yang lain beres....buku xbuat....dah siap..tp selalu lupa nak hantar.....daily lesson plan sentiasa beres...tapi xhantar je...leh ke mcm tu?????????hahahahah...biarlah....malas nk pk..sebab dalam kepala ni berserabut serabai lagi mcm2 hal yang xsettle.....bilalah hal tu semua nak settle yea????????????????????????????????????